The Rift Between Sex and Fantasy

There appears to be a rift between fantasy and sex.

Spending time in the dungeon corridors of the internet, you come across some strange encounters. Some of them are fellow adventurers looking for fame, fortune and treasure. Other times you come across trolls and monsters ready to spill your blood (or worse yet, eat you). I personally try to avoid the monsters because I feel I’m more like a lover then a fighter, sneaking away like a rogue when she spots a room filled with Beholders. (Unless they are sexy monsters. Then I will stay and steal their hearts with giggles and exposed cleavage.)

During my travels, I came across a vocal adventurer discussing how annoyed they were that sex was invading fantasy books they were reading. I took note on how they seemed to dislike the acts of sex and love making, looking for more of the story instead. My interest stirred and set about trying to find more on this very subject. My quick travels indicated that it wasn’t always the case but it does happen, like a carrion crawler in the night.

(Okay, enough with the D&D metaphors.)

Some readers like their fantasy and sex separate. Now this isn’t a growing problem as far as I know but it did cause my mind to wander. What is so bad about sex and fantasy (And to another degree, sex and sci-fi)? Is entwining the two turning into a taboo for hardcore fantasy readers? Had we reached a point in our evolution where sex is seen as a less interesting topic then fantasy? Is talking about the meeting of two bodies (Or more) a distraction then a moment of titillation?

I pondered these thoughts over a glass of pinot noir and watching the latest episode of Game of Thrones. I couldn’t get past the idea that sex was considered a negative thing since a show like Game of Thrones melds the two very well and is exceedingly popular. My mind spun on as the episode ended and I had another two glasses of wine. After some thought and a few wine induced phone calls to friends, the thoughts began to settle.

I’m not here to start a fight or end one. I’m here to cast my opinion on something that should open the conversation to our views of sex, fantasy and sci-fi.

I believe that many people do love their fantasy and lust dancing together to a song, hands touching and bodies close. There will always be purists who believe that everything must be put in a box and shelved in different corners so they do not infect one another. Some are more vocal then others and cling to a set of rules to help make sense of themselves and the world around them. People will nit-pick the strangest things because it affects them on a level most of us will never understand, nor should we. Those who are vocal because a sex scene disrupted the flow of a story should take a step back and question why something as beautiful or ugly (Or beautifully ugly or fugly beautiful) would have such an impact? Why was something as wondrous as love making take you down a path I cannot follow?

Personally, I love sex and fantasy (And sci-fi). For decades I read many books but I found many of them lacking the depth of a union between two characters. How two people could love and fight for one another but not spend time with their bodies in the most intimate embrace was beyond me. Life and society is full of sex and with good reason, it not only feels good, it drives us and completes us. It is as natural as eating, breathing and the unspeakable acts in the water closet…powder room…..latrine (Bathroom).

Life is a messy clash of bodies, minds, ideas, desires and passions. Instead of spending time trying to further the divide of sex and fantasy, we should be talking about how we can bring it together.

Being an erotic fantasy writer, I have taken the slings and arrows a number of times. Looking at some the reviews of my books, you can see the rift where my art was referred as trash or my favorite, “a teenager’s idea of porn”. I don’t like to engage the negative (not that porn is a negative) and often tell myself that they are entitled to their opinion. On the other hand, I am also entitled to my opinion and here it is….

Sex, lust, desire and fun will spill into our art, our stories and our lives. We should laugh and love, discussing great works and not so great works of fantasy and sex over glasses of wine (Or beer) from sun down to sun up. Read erotic tales to ourselves, our partners and/or our special friends on comfy couches. Don’t turn away from the warmth, turn to it and let it light your soul and body on fire. If you must be an elitist, be a kind one with an understanding heart and an open mind. Have fun and stop pissing on things that other people may like and want to read.

Finally, I know that this opinion may get thrown back in my face because I am an erotic writer. The only thing I can say to that is I have always written tales with strong sexual content and after the world ends, I will be in my hole in the ground, writing stories on pieces of paper by candle light so the mutants will have something to read (And hopefully find titillating).

So, pour your drinks, expose your swords, ready your sheaths and begin the conversation. Close the rift between sex and fantasy by charging into the valley of doubt and whisper sweet nothings until the rift closes and fireworks fill the sky.

Or just read what you want and don’t be a kobold to others who like their sex and fantasy together.

~Eden